The Machete Heist

December 5, 2010 at 6:54 pm | Posted in Cuzco, Kiva, Peru, Philosophy, Travel | 5 Comments
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I am literally writing this with blood on my hands.  O and if you are my parents, lets just skip over this blog post.  This happened less than one hour ago, and is the most crazy thing that has ever happened to me in a South American country.  I mean more crazy than being robbed in Guatemala City, or having a tire iron being waved in my face by a taxi driver in Argentina, or even seeing 4k of coke being pulled out from the seat in front of me the last time I was here in Peru.

Here is what happened. This morning, I decided to go for a run to start training for the Inca Trail or even more immediately, my potential backpacking trip to the Lares valley next weekend.  I headed up to the Temple of the Moon (ok, I didn´t run up the hills, but did some trail running once I got up there) where I had gone hiking with some friends the week before.  At the end of my run, I decided to hike up to the top of the tallest hill in the valley to rest and take in the view.

As I approached, I saw three 15-17 year old Peruvians coming up at the same time.  I didn´t think anything of it until I saw one coming up my left hand side, and the other two (one in a Yankees cap…I think this speaks volumes) walking behind me.  My very imaginative mind flashed to all sorts of movies where they were surrounding me and cutting off my exits and saw a place straight ahead where I could run down unobstructed.  I immediately dismissed this as ridiculous because this only happens in movies right?

Less than ten seconds later, the kid I saw on my left hand side ran up and sat down by me, put his arm around my neck forcefully and said “tienes sencillo” more or less meaning do you have exact change.  I jumped up realizing what was happening and tried to throw him off me when I saw the kid in the Yankees cap with a two and a half foot machete run up and tell me to hand over all my stuff.

The rest is a blur. I remember trying to get loose and telling them both ok I´ll hand over my stuff (then I thought about my brand new canon camera and my credit cards in my bag and knew I didn´t want to do that) but told them to let me go first.  I remember thinking about yelling, but who was around? I remember the kid in the Yankees cap holding the machete low and swinging it at me and me jumping back. And I remember trying to grab the machete so it won´t hit me. I remember finally grabbing kid A and throwing him into the kid with the Yankees cap and rock hopping and scrambling down the mountain.

Then, I all out sprinted a kilometer (which is superhuman at 12k feet) through some trees downhill to the Temple of the Moon (they chased me for a while, but thank God for long legs).  I got chased by the dog of a couple of older Peruvians who I warned about the robbers.  And finally, finally, I made it to the security guard who stands guarding the site, and told him all about it.

I ran/jogged back into the city with a don´t mess with me grimace on my face. I don´t know how all of it happened, but I assure everyone that I am fine, that I will find people to hike with, and that the cuts on my hands from scrambling and from the fight will heal.  Below is a picture from the moon temple. It all went down on the hill a little to the left of the photo:

From Templo de la Luna
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5 Comments »

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  1. ………..

  2. Eric. Scary bro. I’m glad you’re OK.

  3. Okay…a bit crazy! So glad you are fast!

  4. Woah dude, take care out there. Glad to hear you escaped [relatively] unscathed.

  5. […] Visiting the U.S. My weekend in San Diego. Moving to Cusco, Peru. Finding the meeting place. The near miss with a Machete Robbery. Having Marc Capule come visit. Exploring the Incan Culture and Ruins. Christmas with Peruvians […]


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